Like a ton of bricks, it hit me. Just now.
In two weeks, Matt and I will be picking up our lives and moving 1,100 miles away. It seriously just totally and completely set in that this is really happening. To be honest, I'm not liking it.
I don't have some huge fear of moving. I don't have a fear of this new job with Disney. I am experiencing total heartbreak that I'm leaving behind my family, and I have no idea when I'm going to see them next. It's selfish of me to ask my mom to come see me once a month, but that's really what I want to say. I want to tell everyone to just relocate down there as well so I don't have to be without them. I'm really going to miss seeing the people I'm closest to every single week.
Up until now I was just thinking about how I'm more worried that people will be without me. I have been telling myself that I know I'll be okay and handle everything just fine. That it's everyone else I'm worried about. Now that isn't really the case. I don't know when I'll start to get time off at work to be able to fly back home. I might have to go without seeing some family until next year. That's just really hard to swallow. I seriously give credit to military families that go through being apart all the time.
I have been really trying to push my emotions down to make it easier to handle everything else that is going on. Just the past few days I've been forced to come face to face with the emotional aspect of moving away. I'm leaving my job of 7 1/2 years. Leaving my house that I've lived in for 7 years. Leaving the only little city that I've ever lived in. I know that I'm gaining so much by moving to Florida, but I can't help reflecting on how much life is changing for Matt and I.
I'm very thankful that we get to spend a week in Florida with Matt's parents and my mom. This will be a nice way to transition into a new life. Aside from getting Matt and I settled, we're all going to be able to do some fun things together. I can't wait to drive around the area and see things I've never seen before. "Look at the stuff. Isn't it neat?"
My six year old niece and I had a heart to heart the other evening. I told her that I'm really going to miss her when I'm in Florida, but that she can come see me and I can come back and see her. Then she tapped me on the shoulder and whispered in my ear, "But, Aunt Stacey! You know what? We can Skype!" In that moment, her little voice made me feel so much better and filled me with hope that it will all be okay.
Well... until next time. "TTFN, Ta-ta for now!"
